I understand why feminists would hate the porn industry—exploitation of women at a young age, pressure on people to conform to unrealistic expectations, etc. But the feminist argument against porn as a thing, the porn industry notwithstanding, is based on some assumptions—that sexuality is always a tool of exploitation, that male sexuality is abusive, and that sexual attraction without affective relationships is inherently exploitive.
Feminists are right to call out the use of sexuality as a tool for oppression, but to see all sexuality as oppression is absurd.
"Judging a book by its cover is the new tolerance. We throw people into the stocks based on feelings while ignoring intent and assuming victimhood. This is why I fundamentally disagree with equating offense with harassment: it provides unlimited ammo and shuts down discussion rather than giving people the benefit of doubt. It elevates the exception to the norm, by presuming the worst."
Some people would find that absolutely inappropriate, pushing the homosexual agenda in a conference, violating their religious sensibilities. Do you think those Christians should speak up, start a petition, try to get the talk banned... or maybe just not go to it?
Actually, now that I think about it, what if the developer who joked about dongles was gay? We know the developer is heterosexual, but Adria couldn't know then. Even if he used gendered language—what if he was closeted and couldn't talk about sex with men publicly? Why did she assume talking about penises meant he was a misogynist?
And, yes, obviously, Adria has the right to not attend. She ALSO has the right to say that you shouldn't have a talk that celebrates something that many people find utterly vile is not appropriate. I don't think Adria was ever alleging that what they were doing was illegal.
We would all hopefully object to someone having a talk called "Taking Naked Kiddie Pics" with a line about "how thinking like a pedophile can capture people's imagination". I would hope that people wouldn't think it was inappropriate to speak up -- even petition -- against such a talk, right?
That's my point.
[NOTE: I am NOT saying that porn is as bad as kiddie porn. Of course it's not. The analogy I'm drawing is simply that we DO think it's okay to speak up about things that we think are vile or morally wrong. Many people (religious conservatives, etc) see porn that way.]