"There are two types of people in the world: those who choose to be happy, and those who choose to be unhappy."

What a pile of shit. People who are in chronic pain can't necessarily "choose" to be happy.

After that, the article turns into the most banal, worthless list of self-help platitudes I've ever read.

I'm a very happy person by the way, and I'm interested in techniques for becoming happier. I also dislike bullshit.

Exactly.

Apparently, happy people let others walk over them, have no sense of perspective, are complacent and don't try to improve, don't plan for the future, ignore their failures, define themselves by the people they spend time with, and participate in fad hobbies and diets.

If that's happiness, I'm apparently miserable, and I find myself quite pleased with that.

I understand that this was well meaning, but it seems like normal health advice mixed with platitudes you can get by going to any kindergartener and asking them "how to be happy?"

Well I am a happy person. I coincidentally do most of that list as well.... but most of those items seem just common sense...

I think most people lack common sense. Otherwise, how can you explain such basic issues such as high levels of obesity?