Your comment "you don't corner the market in this particular skill" is the most interesting part, it sounds like you are irritated that the assumption that technical and analytical people are somehow less sensitive but then your comment exhibits exactly the lack of understanding and immediate condescension which earns this perception. I doubt you intended it, but it's something to think about.
Well, that's a fine ad hominem, but it doesn't address what I wrote. I'm clearly irritated by the post; that's not a mystery. But to argue that I'm being patronizing, you have to ignore what I'm actually saying: we all have innate social skills, and that the author starts from the opposite premise. He's trying to figure out why this "developer CEO" is so different, when the difference appears to be trivial (one person is asking analytical questions).
The original post was clearly phrased in an adversarial manner:
"Sales Guy" vs "Developer Guy"
"I, on the other hand..."
"Whereas he based the value of the meeting..."
"Where he took my generalized questions and drove them to specific topics - that was the interesting part. That let me know what’s on his mind."
Plus, there was the hint of a "gotcha" tone:
"That will give me the context for assessing future activities by his company."
Basically, he's starting from the premise that this other person is somehow not making these social judgments; that they're not building a mental model of how their conversational partner operates. That's wrong, and it's (IMO) arrogant: his thinking rests upon the implicit assumption of The Other as a stranger. Not everyone makes this assumption -- many (if not most) people will start from an assumption of similarity on matters of human nature.
This is clearly a compare and contrast piece. He is contrasting what he took from the meeting with what the Developer CEO took from the meeting, with a heavy implication that those benefits were exclusive to each other. He says it more or less explicitly:
"I suspect in his mind the benefit of meeting was directly related to his perception of the quality of data in my answers."
Also look at the language construct used:
"Whereas he based the value of the meeting on the quality of the data I focus on how much I think I got an accurate snapshot of how the person thinks and operates."
The google definition of 'whereas' is "In contrast or comparison with the fact that.".
To possibly overthink social cues, I think that timr wrote a true but slightly condescending response to a slightly condescending article. Since engineers commonly are condescending to sales people, and since HN is filled with contrarians, someone felt obligated to stick up for the sales guy.
Is natural that the old school yuppie feel threatened by this new specie of ceo.. this new species are the one who will replace them in a near future..
Of course the tech ceo will need to suck the knowledge from the generation that were in the battle front.. thats his nature.. he is a hacker, he learn fast, he thinks fast..
this is not just about different points of view.. this is a generational clash.. two different generations meeting each other while they are all in the game..
this is the dawn of the salesman, and the rise of the geeks of course they are all afraid, they should be :)
For the record, great salespeople are very often also "deeply analytical." In fact, having hired & managed lot's of salespeople, I'd suggest listening, observation & analytical skills are the differentiating factor between the good and the great.
PS - the unfair judgements regarding arrogance is a two-way street.
He came off as curious about how developers think and operate and very open-minded about learning from it.
Unlike your comment here.
Yes, they are.
Dear, "Sales Guy CEO": if you again find yourself in the situation where you're in a conversation with a deeply analytical person, it's probably in your best interest not to assume that your conversation partner is socially clueless just because she is asking good, specific, actionable questions. If they're smart enough to ask good questions, it probably means they're smart enough to read your reactions and personality, as well. You don't corner the market on that particular skill.
Honestly...this is why "sales guys" get a reputation for arrogance amongst nerds. People who grew up as social outcasts are often keenly aware of the social dynamics of the world around them.