"you install library X, it wants to install mail server Y and database Z)"
Almost exactly what happened when I installed nmh. Wasn't at all obvious from the dependency list that I'd get qmail, didn't pay attention to the warning prompt and said Y, ...
Bonus, I have a bunch of new system accounts in my Display Manager's login screen. Bleah. Fortunately my scorched-earth reinstall is coming up, so I just leave them there to make it easier to hate what happened.
There are many approaches that one would mistake as being "reinventing the wheel":
1. FreeBSD ports system is barebones, but incredibly simple and transparent.
2. Arch Linux's PKGBUILD recipes are also simple and, at times, a much better alternative to binary packages.
3. Gobo Linux (http://www.gobolinux.org) solved binary packaging the right way by having each package in it's own tree. It's approach is similar to OS X, which also gets this right.