> Go to conferences. ... Find conferences that relate to it and attend... later, speak at said conferences.

Well, I'm screwed. I can barely speak in private or deal with people.

Perhaps someone else can use your advice, though.

Kaizen. Small improvements. Start now and don't deviate.

You grow by constantly pushing yourself just barely outside of your comfort zone. No anxiety or panic needed, just a little tiny dose of discomfort.

Start now, with the smallest improvement you could possibly make. Then continue to make one small improvement every day.

Are you a complete shut in? Make it your goal to spend just 1 minute outside in public. If 1 minute is too much, then make it 10 seconds. Do it again tomorrow, and add just a little more time. Did you feel a bit uncomfortable? Good. If not, push yourself just a little more.

Are you good with being outside? Make eye contact with one person for 1 second. Tomorrow, make eye contact with two people. Or try to hold eye contact for 2 seconds.

Good with eye contact? Let's get talking.

Go to the grocery store and use the human checkout line instead of the self-checkout. Then the next day, make it your goal to say one sentence to the checkout person beyond the usual pleasantries. A comment about the weather will be just fine. Once you're good with talking about the weather, ask the checker if they have big exciting plans for this evening/the weekend/Christmas/whatever.

Just take action every day. ACTION. EVERY. DAY.

If you feel like you're not making process fast enough, or if you slip up one day and stay firmly within your comfort zone, don't beat yourself up about it. Just get out there tomorrow and make one small improvement. Small improvements will have a huge effect on your quality of life before you even realize it.

I've been there. It's possible. Start now and don't deviate.

This is inspiring, you should write a book.

Thankfully, someone already did. It's short and sweet.

http://www.amazon.com/Small-Step-Change-Your-Life/dp/0761129...

Thanks, will to get a hold of it.

There was also a time you could barely walk.

Even if you have social anxiety, or are somewhere on the autistic spectrum, you can still improve your social skills. Because they are skills, not traits. You can improve them through practice. It will be difficult, of course, if you have a problem such as social anxiety. But consider seeking help for that, if it is a problem. It can improve your life immensely - and not just professionally.

One great way is to volunteer at the conference. Why?

1. You're forced to interact with at least some set of people regularly. Even if you find it difficult to 'cold call' a person or group of people and socialize at the event, you are guaranteed to have interacted with a minimum number of people.

2. There are set goals to accomplish, and it can be easier to work with people you don't know if you just focus on the work. It basically gives you an excuse to interact with people, because you don't have to worry about awkwardly fumbling around to find some common ground to chat about.

3. If you make yourself extremely useful (always looking to help out, asking what else you can do), people will recognize this.

>>Go to conferences. ... Find conferences that relate to it and attend... later, speak at said conferences. >Well, I'm screwed. I can barely speak in private or deal with people.

Maybe things are different in tech, but I don't know anyone who likes attending or speaking at conferences. Don't think of them as trips, think of them as work. Because they are.

Things can be very different in tech.

When your job keeps you mentally and physically isolated from your coworkers, getting together with like minded people to talk shop is nice. Even more so because for some developers talking shop is one of the few conversation topics they feel comfortable with.

When your job is slugging away at decades old enterprise code, watching a talk about game development, fancy math, or improved development environments can be a breath of fresh air.

When your job has you at the bottom of ten layers of bureaucracy, telling people about something they should do, and having them listen and agree is wonderful.

Tech conferences are a joy.

Point taken; I was saying (unclearly, maybe) that not liking conferences/speaking/whatever is a pretty weak reason for avoiding them. Lots of people don't like them, but go because it's what the job requires (and, just to preempt replies, act pleasant and engaged while there).

Are you kidding? I love going to conferences and speaking at them! Especially if you do not work in an office, they are a great way to find who is doing what, what's new, where you are behind,nowhere you are in front.

If you aren't prepared to go to, ad get involved with, conferences, then all of the advice in this article is going to pass you by. Because it's all about establishing credibility and then leveraging it.

I've taken two vacations for conferences this year... Maybe I'm crazy. Clojure/West and Strange Loop. Maybe you just need to go to better conferences.

Although it looks cheesy, this book is full of actionable suggestions on how to be able to speak to people.

http://www.mpowers.com/books/charisma.html

I definitely recommend it.

and if you aren't comfortable speaking or attending conferences, don't let that stop you from becoming an authority. find a topic you are interested in and start learning it in depth. identify common issues beginners struggle with and blog about them. move on to more advanced articles. you should gain recognition pretty readily.