Instead maybe consider that it's thinking in tribes that's the issue at root.
Personally I think it's impossible to stop being in a tribe. One should, if free, only be able to choose the tribe to join. We can't choose not to join a tribe. Most people either are not free to choose or not willing to consider that they can choose. Freedom to choose a tribe is very scary.
Looking at how other countries do politics might help. For example did you know that conspiracy and paranoia is a characteristic strategy used in American politics? It's not used as much in other parts of the world.
It's incredibly difficult for a person to see themselves as being paranoid or to believe in a conspiracy theory. But paranoid people who believe in conspiracy theories make great tribe members. It is literally a way to make people think of things as "us vs them"
https://nakedpastor.com/cdn/shop/files/We_Might_Disagree.jpg
I'm 52 and there was a time in my life when I could be friendly with people who voted Republican despite disagreeing with them on most policy matters. And if you're a historical conservative anti-Trumper we're still cool even if I disagree with most of your views on economics and (probably) a lot of your social views. But if you're still actively supporting the Republican party now we're done, I can't look past it.
And because the whataboutism is inevitable, I think the modern Democratic party is awful in all sorts of ways but for me there's a vast difference between garden variety corruption and ineffectiveness (which, don't get me wrong still sucks, and still needs to be fought against) vs a party that is now universally bowing to actual authoritarian fascism.
If you support the current Republican party you are either too stupid or too evil for me to look past it and give you any benefit of the doubt. Don't care if you're family, don't care if you're an ex-friend.