Depends on how hard you want it. I spent more than a decade between the start of the search for proper property and buy decision. I even managed to sign my mortgage agreement in last weeks of cheap money in eurozone. It’s a long game unless you have a case full of cash.

To a degree. But plenty of people want it real bad and there aren't enough days of avocado toast in a month that add up to a mortgage.

Saving a down payment in a single month would mean you have a pretty sizable income to start. I get what you’re saying, but if it’s a $10 avocado toast every day, then there are enough days in 3 years to save a $10k down payment for a starter home.

One of the unintuitive consequences of low interest rates/ZIRP is that the savings rate is abysmal. When I was a kid I remember my first savings account earned maybe 2 or 3% interest annually. Now you’re lucky to get half a percent. People are disincentivized from saving money and instead end up putting savings into investments, which are inherently risky.

> Now I’m in my 30s and I have no idea when I’ll buy a house, if ever.

This might not be what you want to do, or hear; I know it wasn't what I wanted in my late 20s. But you could own a house within a year or so if you decide you want a house more than living in an expensive area.

I spent my 20s banging my head against an impossibly expensive area trying to find something and perpetually failing (in my case, NYC). In my late 20s I gave up, moved to a very suburban (borderline rural) area and bought a house right away.

If one wants children, is planning on children, one wants good public schools for them, and those are generally found in areas with significant population and higher land values. If you can plan around home schooling and one parent staying home to conduct it, rural living may be a great choice. But trips to libraries might be long, and fast internet connections unavailable or unaffordable. Those amenities are available where population is denser.

It is, in my observation, a popular HN myth that amenities only exist in hyper-dense and expensive cities. But it's not true.

In my very suburban (low density suburban, surrounded on two sides by forest) area the library is a 10 minute walk away at toddler-speed so my child has been an avid visitor as soon as started reading a tiny bit. Schools are also walking distance (high school will be a bit farther, but within easy cycling distance, about 2 miles). And yes, we have internet in the suburbs.

Have you considered getting married? I may very well have been able to afford a house before I got married but the timing and the compromises that would have entailed always seemed to hold me back.

Once I got married though there was both more money and a realization that some possibilities (you know I might just pick up sticks and move across the country) were less likely. Plus expanding our family was very possible.

There's a reasonable view that says finding a spouse is a more major undertaking then finding a house. I honestly don't think that's the case. Go out on a date withe someone, if you enjoy it repeat that a few times. After 6 months imagine it'll be that way for the rest of your life,and then ask yourself, is it really that bad? If the answer is no propose marriage.