Thank you for sharing that. I’m not going to address every example in your comment, and I agree that there are many ways society could be more accommodating. But I also think that not every difference can be accommodated in every situation, even if disability advocates don’t always want to admit it. Some jobs require you to talk on the phone, just like some jobs require you to lift heavy boxes. Not everyone can do that, and that’s ok. I can tell you with absolute certainty that I could not do my job as an engineering executive if I could not talk on the phone or video calls, since so much of my job is about making emotional connections with other people, understanding subtle cues and subtext, and influencing people. I have colleagues who I know are on the spectrum, and I greatly respect them and do try to accommodate them where possible. But some things require a level of social skills they simply don’t have.

Beyond that, I have to be honest: reading about your struggles with communication, lights, noise, etc. it’s frankly hard me to fathom why anyone would not want medication that can alleviate those symptoms. I was diagnosed with ADHD in my 30s, and my whole life suddenly made more sense. Stimulant medication dramatically improved my executive function, attention, concentration, impulsivity, etc. but I am still in every way myself while medicated. I am just more in control of myself. I realize there is no medication like that for autism yet, but if there was, I simply can’t imagine someone not wanting it when my life was improved so dramatically by treating my much-less-severe condition.