Seriously. I don't want an incredibly powerful chatbot or whatever.

Those are just wastes of electricity and water and result in nature being paved over by data centers.

I use Siri for cooking (on the iPhone it can still only handle one timer at a time), for adding to Groceries, turning some lights and fans on/off, and playing music.

I enabled 'Always Show Speech' and even if the text indicates Siri understood what I said, it still often does the wrong thing anyway.

Well, that all Siri can do right now. If it could add something to my grocery list (3rd part app) or tell me what the gym schedule looks like tomorrow (in another app), or turning navigation voice on or off while driving, I would be doing that a lot!