You could always start with the self-assessments at https://embrace-autism.com/autism-tests/ but if you want an official diagnosis you'll see a doctor, with or without insurance, whatever that may mean for your circumstances. (In mine, it would mean "paying for the test out of pocket".)

Ty for sharing the link. I think the problem I'm having with this is i don't think the answers fit what I think? For instance "I know how to tell if someone listening to me is getting bored." I just assume everyone is bored when I speak which option do I choose for that?

I have autistic people in my family, and one of them said (jokingly) that not knowing how to answer the questions on self assessment forms should be enough evidence of autism.

It was a joke, but there's something to it. People's autism can manifest in many different ways, but from what I have observed:

- Language seems full of ambiguity. ('How often is "often"?', or 'Concentrate on the full picture? It depends on the picture!')

- Reading too much into a question, so everything sounds impossible. ("How can I really know if someone is actually bored or pretending to be bored?")

- Questions from a neurotypical perspective seem absurd, since your experiences are so different. (Adaptive behaviors like assuming people are bored could make this seemingly simple yes/no question irrelevant.)

There's probably more.

I've gone through a bunch of these, and had people with formal autism diagnoses go through them, and people who definitely are not autistic go through them, and we compared results. (There were stark differences.)

Anyway, the tests on that site usually have some commentary (before the test itself) that helps explain some situations where you may get hung up on which answer is "correct".

It's worth noting that the "allistics" who cooperated with me on this had no difficulties whatsoever with any of the answers and found the questions more or less absurd and completely unrelatable.

Rather dramatically different experiences of the world, apparently.

Then you put "no" since you clearly can't distinguish when someone is bored.

Assuming boredom is not necessarily an inability to determine it, it may be an inability to accept a positive answer, as would be the case with poor self-esteem. Someone could of course both be autistic and have low self-esteem, and they may be related for complex reasons, but they aren't necessarily. This is why just taking random surveys without an expert is not a good way to diagnose.

In my experience, the most reliable informal indicator of autism is if basically all of your friends are diagnosed autistics. It's like that study where neurotypicals were able to point out the autistic person in a room simply based on whether they "feel different" - this ability to tell whether someone shares your way of thinking is actually common to most neurotypes, including autistic neurotypes. One typically ends up subconsciously selecting for neurotypes similar to their own when choosing who to make friends with. This isn't to say that they don't make friends with other neurotypes, just that they're more likely to make friends with similar neurotypes, and the majority of their friends are very likely to have similar neurotypes to their own.

Of course, going to a professional for a real assessment is the only thing I can really recommend. This would certainly be strong supporting evidence though, and meets my standard for self-diagnosis.

no i meant in a life spanning 20 something years I've only met two people who could talk to me for an extended time isn't that a good metric to use to say I'm boring like objectively?

> I just assume everyone is bored when I speak

Sorry to say, and this is not a diagnosis, but that's more common for anxiety and depression than autism.

I think it can be common among others as well :)

The reason for why you assume this makes a big difference.

Unfortunately anxiety and depression are also very common comorbidities in autism, so there's that overlap too.

No single question, or even single form, would be enough to tell whether someone is autistic or not.

Anxiety and depression absolutely do not contraindicate autism. Where did you even hear that?

You know, detail-oriented thinking as in autism can make it a lot easier to fixate on specific negatives or anxieties compared to neurotypicals.

Speaking more broadly, try taking the test with someone who knows you well.

When I was tested for autism, my interviewer requested my wife be there specifically to help answer some things which I did not understand fully and didn't have good context for. It was helpful both for the diagnosis and to open the door for my wife and I to have better conversations about my needs.

... The irony of autistic folk having needs but having considerably more trouble communicating those needs, especially while burnt-out and needing more, is it's own, considerably large, domain.

I guess the main question is why do you want to get tested? What are you seeking to get out of it?

If you had autism, what would you do with that diagnosis? There is no pill for autism.

In the end, provided you've been functional in society so far in your adult life, a diagnosis won't change _you_.

What a diagnosis can do is lead to an in-road for specific types of therapy designed to help you cope with specific symptoms and/or navigate through social life.

But that kind of therapy is not free in the US.

A diagnosis can mean accommodations, e.g. if you take a standardized test and have a diagnosis, they'll let you take it in an isolated environment.

Might want to try looking for neuropsychologists in your area that specialize in autism. There are tests they can do to diagnosis various neurological issues and some behavioral issues. Depending on your area, they could be expensive (around DC, they can be $5k) and testing could take a full day.

Does it affect you negatively in your life? The point of a clinical diagnosis is so that you can get further help to address issues. If it doesn't affect you negatively, then you won't get a clinical diagnosis. Autistic is just a label for a very diverse condition. You are probably atypical neurologically in some respect, just accept it as part of you.

Whether or not they have an autistic neurotype is something they deserve to know whether they want help with it or not.

What is the point?

I recognize myself in lots of things that are described by some people having autism and out of curiosity I ran an online test once that basically said that I might but it was also clearly not definitive. But more often than not I didn't really know where to put the cursor between totally agree and totally disagree so I answered some of them very randomly.

From what I understand if you are not neurotypical there is very little that can be done and I don't think it should be considered a disease to be slightly different. I honestly prefer not to know as I don't think it would help me in my struggles regardless of the result and if I was I am not sure I would want to be labelled as such. YMMV of course.

it's possible it could be worth trying to implement coping strategies and methods for people with autism and see if it helps your life. the end result of getting diagnosed would effectively be "here's how to cope with autism" so you can just skip the diagnosis part and try the coping part. if it doesn't help, no harm in trying.