Well dang I work in a research lab and I didn’t get an email.

I’m just going to assume my research is so interesting that they sent the real badasses after me, somebody that Apple can’t catch. The truth is too ego-shattering.

You probably have been targeted with the more advanced spyware that Apple hasn’t detected yet. ;)

Look to your left. Look to your right.

Both of those people are working for a foreign government.

At least one of them does not know it.

Trust no one.

If this is sarcasm, I love it. If you're serious then I don't.

I think it must be, it is a re-spin of a common “toxic STEM professor” meme.

It's a story told to first-year law students: Look to your left, look to your right, only one of you three will become a lawyer.

The first day at university in the 80s, Computer Science, the head of faculty told us that stats were that only 30% made it to graduation and started walking in front of the first row of the hall. “You will graduate, you won't, you won't. You will graduate, you won't, you won't." Motivational speech or not, at least half of the students dropped out in the first two years. The goal of those two years seemed to be right that: convincing people to leave. Then it got easier and more interesting.

Similar experience in EE, the first year requirements were full of "filter" or "weed-out" courses in math and physics.

The generous argument is that it's only fair to the student that they should know quickly whether they'll be able to get through the material. Failing fast can be merciful.

The truth is probably more complicated. Let's just say that the student population ended up looking a lot like the TA and professor population. Lather, rinse, repeat.

This comment has an off-by-one error.

For now

So may different ways to read that, haha

My next question would be "What do your immediate relatives and friends do, or what are they involved with?"

NSO was targeting something like 40k people just in mexico. It's entirely possible that this was an accidental targeting because they have a similar name or email to a target.

It could also be an accidental misidentification - maybe OP has the same name as someone they actually wanted to target, or their phone number or email address is very similar to someone they wanted to target.

Or, it could be an intentional misidentification - maybe OP has a friend who was picked up by whatever east european security services, and provided OPs name as some kind of co-conspirator in something OP's friend was into.