I feel this, and it's pretty dismaying. I'm ok enough with Apple still, but I do question it frequently. I'm watching closely the Asahi project and Haiku (I know, orthogonal approach) on the desktop and constantly questioning my use of smartphones. I don't love the walled garden that Apple has become, either.
But let's be real, a smart phone is practically a requirement to participate in modern society, and there are two options. iOS and Android. "Opting out" is becoming increasingly hypothetical.