But its an exercise in masochistic self flagellation to be a tech nerd with no interest in linux (learning OS structure and CLI syntax) to use it on a daily basis. Linux is extremely powerful via the command line. But I have no interest in learning/memorizing commands.

Somewhat true. But ... it's also true for Windows. Did you see the post above? https://github.com/GoofGarage/Win11Clean. It's a very long list of instructions just to get the think installed in a way that keeps most of Microsoft's fingers out of your pockets and while keeping the familiar Windows interface. But if you follow it you will have a non-standard install, and later some overnight upgrade will break it.

A desktop environment like KDE is a fully modern, integrated desktop even down to being able to use KDE Connect to use your smart phone from your desktop.

You mentioned hating Ubuntu and 3 other distros, but really the fundamental differences between distros is mostly how they package software, and how frequently they downstream new software. Install something like Pop_OS, never touch a terminal and move on.

Of course they're UX issues that could be improved, especially with Canonical trying to push Snap on people, but I'm more inclined to believe many peoples' exasperation with the Linux desktop experience is really due to long-standing familiarity with Windows. The things you "have to learn" as an enthusiast coming from the Windows ecosystem are things that by its conventions are done through graphical interfaces. Which doesn't make them easier, you've just already memorized them.

So I need someone to make an OS with the longstanding windows user in mind. Using a GUI absolutely is easier. I need drop down lists and check boxes. Mouse hover tips and visual menus. Not some cryptographic string of command line arguments that I am futilely copy+pasting from some random web page.

Additionally, graphical interfaces have a lot of downsides, as Microsoft themselves has discovered as evidenced by how over the past couple years they've been promoting PowerShell as a way to automate administrative tasks on Windows themselves and allow powerusers to pass around PowerShell invocations for quick fixes in the same way users of every other OS have for decades.

It's entirely possible to install and use Linux without touching the command line, just like with Windows. The days where command-line skills were required passed a long while back.