Considering how easy it is to get sent back to prison if you’re in probation, it seems like you’re a small minority!

Minority, but not small. Something like 40% do not complete probation.

Is that because they want to be in prison, or because they're fuckups who think they can get away with violating the terms of their probation but get caught?

I think mileage varies man. You get a good probation officer and can basically do as you please. You get a crappy one and they show up randomly everywhere. It also depends on if you are pushing the rules. If your probation officer doesn't trust you it's going to be a bad time

I'll get a remote job and eat poptarts delivered by amazon. I won't leave the damn house unless the PO says I have to. He can show up and watch me program anytime he likes.