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Re:'It's quite soul-destroying': how we fell out of love wit... by uoaei on Sunday October 29, 2023 @11:13AM (#38059315)
Do you shove everyone into such tiny, restrictive boxes? Romantic partners certainly don't like being told what they should or shouldn't be and do.
Re:'It's quite soul-destroying': how we fell out of love wit... by moffkalast on Sunday October 29, 2023 @11:42AM (#38059605)
Did the poster above you edit their comment? Asking because your reply is a complete non sequitur.
Re:'It's quite soul-destroying': how we fell out of love wit... by uoaei on Sunday October 29, 2023 @01:16PM (#38060633)
Doesn't look like it, and it's not an irrelevant response at all.

They generalized across an entire group of people "engineers and tech people" all but insisting that they should value "efficiency" over "effort". I am responding to the generalization and the forced assignment of values for those people (me included) prioritizing certain values over others (I don't). In general such an attitude of "shoulds" goes hand-in-hand with a lack of respect for others expressing complexity, subtlety, nuance, and especially agency in such matters. And also encourages race-to-the-bottom behaviors not just economically but also in social dynamics. It's an antisocial attitude and especially romantic partners lose interest very quickly when people act this way.

Source: I was like this once and see it in many techies I know socially. It's a mental shortcut that is common in social settings where techies dominate.