My question wasn't do people want replacement batteries, they clearly do. My question is why they need them? I don't understand how one person's experience with a battery can be so much different than anothers. I would think, if anything, my usage of my phones in my day to day work would mean I'd be harder on phones than most people, not apparently easier.

In a world where Apple slows down your phone when battery is worn out and considers it fair. It should be fair too to have the ability to replace it.

Can't comment on the details of your experience, but both my Pixel phones and iPhones (albeit earlier gen iPhones) all had significant, noticeable battery degradation between years 2 and 3.

What I really want is to be able to replace my battery when it's worn after after years of usage by undoing some screws and fiddling with a gasket. Trying to melt a ton of glue and pull out a glued-in battery without starting a fire is incredibly difficult and unnecessary.

Is it? Do you know that for a fact? Because while admittedly I've not designed a phone, I've owned and used many things that used screws and gaskets to provide protection from water ingress, and those things rarely survived full submersion which is what is offered currently on the iPhone (and has been for some time.) The other day I got in my hot tub after a stressful day of work only to realize my phone was still in my damn pocket, and while I had to take the case off for a bit and let everything air dry, apart from that I walked away from that totally consequence free.

I'm not opposed on principle to people having the option of repairability vs the sleek lines and watertightedness glue assemblies offer, that's completely fine. I just feel the need to push back on this narrative that's gotten so much traction here. There are a LOT of advantages to how newer phones are built that have nothing to do with forcing you over a barrel for maintenance costs, though I'm sure the suits are just fine with it if they do.