It’s your job to tell them if the requirements cannot be met and that something’s gotta give. It’s his job to decide what, and it looks like he’s choosing latency When push comes to shove.

And it's part of the manager's job to tell you "I agree but don't care. Do it anyway or I will find somebody else to do it. For cheaper." Always remember that you are replaceable.

When the newborn is crying and wants food you do what you've got to do. And there are many people like that.

Nah, that sounds like bad management. They should be relaying the requirements to the hardware team.

Most of the time the hardware team doesn't get to choose their hardware. There is usually a budget and in automotive you can select only hardware that has some specific certifications for use in a car so that narrows the list even further.

And once that hardware is selected for a given range of vehicles, it's literally impossible to change. Updates to some parts of the software stack are also basically impossible at a certain point.