Non-techies use Microsoft, Apple, and Google accounts.

Non-techies use Chrome over Firefox.

Non-techies use Windows and MacOS over Linux.

Non-techies use smartphones over phones.

Non-techies use smart TVs over TVs.

Non-techies use social media and have accounts using their real names.

I reiterate: Non-techies don't give a damn about privacy.

You're wrong, they do care about privacy, just at a superficial level. This means that advertising a service as "privacy-oriented" is a positive feature for the normies, but only if it's convenient.

It's kinda like the cruelty-free labels on shampoo.

Non-techies have a poor understanding of the risks, little awareness of privacy protecting alternatives, and a lack of confidence in installing and using new software. It's not that they don't care about their privacy.