I am on the waiting list for therapy for a year. They told me it would be a year. I rang a couple weeks ago and they told me it would be another year. Help is not available. God knows I’ve tried

EDIT: Why downvote? What am I supposed to do?...I'm so tired

Upvoted you to counter the down votes, if it does indeed work that way. Please connect with the guy who has offered to met you.

To the mods: Agreed that making a system that satisfies everybody is difficult, but one cannot in good conscience have a system where a mob might have it's way.

Ignore the downvotes, I'm not sure which country you are in but there are other suicide prevention services in most of them, phone helplines, charities and other options.

And while I know that you don't feel like you have energy to seek for help, please consider do a Google search and reach out to one of the helplines, they will help you find a way out and figure out how you can get some form of help on a shorter notice. Also you have done the first step which is usually the hardest, realised you need help.

let me guess - it's in Germany.

Correct

Isolation is a real problem in this country. Did you also make the mistake of moving to a small city? I spent my last four years at a TU in a small city and it was horrible here. Just one more general problem with this country.

Not sure if it would help, but if you're around the Berlin area and want to grab a beer or coffee with another guy that left academia for the industry (and still has delusions that someday will submit his thesis), hit me up.

I do understand how do you feel. I quit my PhD, it was crazy.

Then the life was better, having normal jobs. Now I have another very difficult situation in life and there is no chance to get professional help. At least some friends are helping.

If you are from south Germany, let me know, we can grab a beer and talk. The life will be better again!