Which of the things you mentioned are equivalent to doing a distracting task during a meeting you're supposed to be paying attention to?

You may be surprised to know that one can do meal prep and pay attention to sprint refinement at the same time. For me, having something to do with my hands while talking helps to keep me focused.

You're supposed to be actively participating in refinement. Reading the story being talked about, looking up documentation, checking on potential solutions, and other things of that nature. You can't do that with raw chicken on your hands or while walking to the fridge to get veggies.

The fact that this has to be explained to people is why there's a push to return to the office.

> You're supposed to be actively participating in refinement. Reading the story being talked about, looking up documentation, checking on potential solutions, and other things of that nature.

That's a load of context that wasn't clear from your original comment. The jargon "refinement" is not used where I work.

> The fact that this has to be explained to people is why there's a push to return to the office.

That you then need to backfill assumed context is not going to be solved by returning to office. That it's now been clarified in text, in a work situation, could be turned into a resource to be referenced in a future conversation. In the office, the explanation would be ephemeral, and may need frequent repetition until somebody overcomes the hurdle of committing it to text.

I'm not sure how this context is relevant. The point is that you're supposed to be paying attention and I've not yet met a human that can pay attention to two things at once as well as they can to one. I've met a lot that think they can but not any that actually could.

This is why return to office is an attractive option. People are definitely not bringing veggies to chop or laundry to fold to a conference room. And most of them are going to pay attention to a person in their presence talking to them because of basic social niceties. It solves the problem with much less hassle than actually having to identify and cull people who can't handle WFH.

“The fact that this has to be explained to people is why there's a push to return to the office.”

Here we have your reason for wanting people in the office - you’re an irrational micromanaging bully who’s inflated ego make you think you’re somehow above strangers and are entitled to lecture them about how they are supposed to work

You make evaluations of people without knowing their story. You make assumptions and feel valid in rushing into those assumptions to put someone beneath you

I’m glad people like you are being phased out of many industries now that WFH is here to stay

> irrational micromanaging bully

The fact that having a standard of "pay attention in meetings & don't be a ghost" gets you labelled an "irrational micromanaging bully" is exactly why management pushes for a return to office. It's just way less of a hassle for them than having these sorts of battles.

> evaluations of people without knowing their story.

Pot meet kettle

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Maybe put your condescension away for a second and try to understand a different perspective.

Your refinements work a little different than mine. In mine, the SME or the person who opened the issue (often the same person) reads the story, gives any extra context, answers questions, etc., we assign a point value, and move on. Refinement can be a discussion -- it doesn't always have to be a research session.

Is that… something that ever happens in a meeting in person?

> Reading the story being talked about, looking up documentation

That seems odd to me. I can give my full attention to something I am reading, or to listening to what a person is saying in the meeting, but not both at the same time. If I start looking up documentation, I'm going to miss what is being said.

Can... can most people split their attention this way? Am I weird?

I can do a completely mindless manual task while listening to someone speaking (though I struggle to do something manual while reading) - but this doesn't seem to be what is expected here.

I can talk and listen while chopping veg, but okay