Re:John Carmack: I loaned money to anyone that asked me
by readthenotes1 on Monday January 09, 2023 @03:28PM
(#34315526)
That was the advice I received many years ago and it has worked extremely well.
An additional mechanic is that you tell them that you are not going to remind them to pay you back, that it is not your job to nag them.
Re:John Carmack: I loaned money to anyone that asked me
by wheels on Monday January 09, 2023 @04:10PM
(#34316108)
A modification I add is to ask them to do it for someone else once they're on their feet again. That's a pretty easy thing to agree to, and the anonymity of it allows the other person to make good on it if they feel that's important without putting any pressure on the friendship.
1) If you are going to be financially impacted in any way by not having the loan repaid you should't "loan" (gift) it. Like gambling don't do it if you can't afford to lose it.
2) Assuming #1, the overall psychological stress and potential impact on the relationship just isn't worth it. As the "lender" you should feel good about helping someone while learning something about them in the process.
Personally, in having this outlook with family and friends they essentially get one shot. If all parties agree it's a loan and the debtor doesn't pay back the funds I move on without impact to the friendship but mentally they have a "strike" in my mind that essentially says "they can still be a good person and friend, but money can never enter the relationship again".
I feel like it's a decent balance.