So far, from the people I have met, I would agree that having a love for the craft distinguishes very good programmers from exceptionally good ones.
There's only so much you can do against someone who is talented and enjoys spending even more time learning something.
I think what you've said is a lot closer to the mark. A love of programming can distinguish the very good from the exceptional.
Although I'd be envious of whoever has the dilemma of having to select a manager from only very good or exceptional candidates.
That's the minority of us. Most of us are average or above average, and applying that rule tends to pick someone closer to my example.
As mentioned in another comment here[1], some programmers don't care about the users, or deadlines. That's fine if programming is your hobby. It's not fine if you're paid to deliver a product.
As an example, if our program doesn't do the right thing on the 1st of January 2023 when regulations change, it is completely useless for all of our users. A programmer who doesn't care about that deadline and the potential effects for the users if it's missed is worthless for us, regardless of skill.
Anyone else feel that people who love programming aren't necessarily great at it?
A lot of devs who "love" programming can be highly opinionated, get distracted by minor issues, have difficulty or reluctance to summarize things to non technical people , have unwieldy PR's containing changes for things way outside of the scope of the task they were given, and don't believe that documentation is something they personally have to do.