My experience of having kids is very similar to yours. But I will say that I'm starting to see light at the end of the tunnel. My kids are now 8 and 4, no more diapers or waking up at night. My wife and I are getting better at managing parenting responsibilities and lifts. My life is getting more balanced again. And I'm feeling a shift closer to what the comment above yours describes, although I'm not entirely there yet. To be fair though we have 4 grandparents to help plus a nannie so not representative of most people.