Lol, this seems a bit naive. It's hard to rape and pillage people you like.
Do you think we've lost the plot a little bit when you have to do these mental gymnastics to distinguish between murdering an entire nation out of some "approved" reason, vs say out of ethnic reasons.
Surely the real crime is murdering a nation.
“Total war” wasn’t a thing in premodern history because every war was a total war.
Total war in particular usually involves civilians as targets, and most civilians were far from the battlefield. WWII changed that, when bombers could reach deep beyond the front lines. Without bombers (and missiles), London would have been untouched by the war, for example.
What I described is tied to the resources and power of the person in charge. I don't see how that's only European?
Total war is a separate concept from genocide. Though both can be practiced in the same war, targeting economic and political support for war does not necessarily mean systemically eliminating a population.