It's very hard to understand what is actually at stake - how would nuclear weapons use actually play out. I'm curious, I just don't know. I have to imagine that and actual use of nuclear weapons would play out very differently from how it's often imagined (i.e the mutually assured destruction idea, or the end of all life on the planet meme).

My gut tells me that the balance of power is not at all as "equal" as it's claimed ("both sides have nukes") but there is enough uncertainly on all sides to want to test it.

The "usual" rules of gradual escalation probably apply. Of course, it's best to avoid any escalation because it can be an uncontrollable situation.