Terraform's 0.12 release[0] was the shining light realization for me that Pulumi's was absolutely the better paradigm. When you start adding expressions, type systems, and ad-hoc iteration primitives to a DSL, you probably should be using a fully powered programming language.
As far as what is kind of offputting to you, I argue that of the two of them Pulumi is the only one with a shot of not doing it the write-it-out-to-text way. Building a representation of desired state is necessary to achieve the goals of both tools -- Pulumi gives you exposure to the objects that make up the tool in your programming language of choice, before they get serialized.
Another key innovation of Pulumi is that you can build those objects and abstractions much easier (IMO) than with TF (i.e. writing a provider), and you can build them with the tooling you're familiar with -- if you're using a supported pulumi language.
[0]: https://vadosware.io/post/setting-up-ses-with-pulumi/
[1]: https://www.hashicorp.com/blog/announcing-terraform-0-12
[0]: https://www.hashicorp.com/blog/announcing-terraform-0-12
I haven't really looked under the hood but I strongly suspect I'm not that far away from truth. At some point I've seriously considered a question why I'm not just templating HCL directly rather than dealing with all those Pulumi oddities.
Either way it feels very different and pretty much alien.