How are other careers relevant? You take the best offer you can get in the (SWE) market, and if avoiding burnout is a choice criterion for you, you avoid the corresponding companies. Many of them are willing to pay the same compensation or more with a reasonable work-life balance, especially once they realize that they also benefit from it one way or another.
One benefit of a free market is to help optimize resource allocations, and telling yourself "it could be worse" rather than asking "could it be better?" is counterproductive.
The US is mixed, and frankly leaning heavily to command-by-committee, same thing that caused the commies to fail. Our committee is the FOMC. Low rates increase valuations on anyone who promises 'the future'. High tech salaries are almost certainly a distortion of their meaningful value.
- I get flexibility at other times to make up for it.
- It isn't super frequent or for very long.
- It is for a good reason.
I don't think even 300k or 400k (or whatever the going rate is for 20 YoE) would be enough for me to deal with regular death marches to help someone meet their OKRs for that quarter. I've happily worked until 3 AM a bunch of nights in a row on something that was important, but I've also busted my ass for things that could have been delivered later or not at all and it wouldn't have really mattered, and those ones are a real punch in the gut.
This isn't true at all. In my last job (not tech) a "brutal" week might be 50 hrs and people were making double that, albeit in more senior roles (10+ years of experience).
SWE is a high paying profession and rightly so because companies get to make millions off our backs.
- If you are an engineer, your total comp is easily north of $200,000. At that pay scale compared to other careers, I expect (and I did) to burn through the night as needed. That's a lot of money for anyone to expect to have a comfortable work/life balance. I always compare myself with doctors residency, accountants, or labor jobs, who would do a lot more work for a lot less. Tech pay, benefit, and work/life balance are outrageously good in my opinion.
- I have worked at AirBnB, Stripe, and Robinhood. And between the 3, AirBnB actually has the chillest work culture. It's known to be "too much democratic debate vs work output". But your experience may be different.
- Most importantly: Just as much as you can quit the company whenever you like, companies can also lay you off whenever they want. My main takeaway is to take care of yourself. Don't buy into Airfam or company family. You do what's right for you and company does what's right for them. (I can't comment on the specifics if Airbnb layoff was the right business move).