I am talking about adults judging other adults decision with hindsight and out of real time with time to reflect.

You are welcome to throw stones if it makes you feel better, but try not to get hit when one flies back through your window in a few years.

> Bad parenting is a thing.

No shit sherlock. Here are some more hot takes for you:

    - too much screen time is bad
    - hitting children is generally counter productive
    - feeding a toddler highly processed foods full of sugar is not a good idea

Armed with this incredible wisdom you can go off and spend more time thinking how stupid and bad other people are at parenting. Have fun!

Ah, there it is. You somehow feel personally offended that someone might not like the important choices made for them.

Sorry this conversation frustrates you. Guess you're still dealing with toddlers which is not something I had considered until now. I thought we were talking about much, much older children. Teens even.

This isn't about "other peopke" though, recognising that your own parents are bad parents is very important, not sure why you try to dismiss that. People telling you that you are wrong, your parents actually did good, is just gaslighting and damaging.

You seem to have a very distorted view. Have you considered the possibility that those people aren't gaslighting you, and that they might be correct?

Have you spent much time interacting with children of abusive parents? I encourage you to go do some research a learn how bad it can get and how difficult it can be for them to struggle towards acknowledging and coming to terms with that abuse.

The “bare minimum” trope has to die.

It never adds anything meaningful to a discussion. Most often, it’s used by someone with little or no experience with a role or responsibility judging someone who is trying to carry out that role, however imperfectly.

If the assumption of a caring parent has to die, then what's the point in any of this?