You've been duped by the loud anti-HOA crowd and their scary stories, then. For most people, living in a condo is hassle-free. It's cheaper to be many when doing repairs. And someone else coordinates everything so one doesn't have to think about maintenance.
Is that someone else going to move my stuff out of the way when the repairmen come to fix the ceiling under the leaky roof? Will that someone else actually let me know when they'll be swinging by? Will they use a quality repairperson or their cousin? Will it take them so long to get someone out to fix the roof, that more rooms need ceiling repair? How are we paying for this coordinator's time?
Oops, I wasn't supposed to think about this.
But yeah, no one can stop you from dreaming up weird scenarios in your head. Doesn't mean you have a point, though..
If you can't coordinate with your neighbors directly, and resort to the courts, you're likely to end up in the same place when you can't coordinate with your neighbors as HOA. Although, sometimes, having established procedures can smooth things over.
Single family detached homes without an HOA may not scale (probably doesn't), as you say in another comment, but that doesn't mean we only think we don't like the options that would scale. I haven't lived in a condo, or in an HOA, because I have had choices and I'm not going to pick a choice I've got enough information to determine I'll dislike.