Yet, when people make jokes about dongles it's also misogynist, because sexuality at the workplace makes women feel uneasy.

From a European standpoint, the simpler explanation (in this particular case) is that the US tech scene is incredibly, fascinatingly prude. It feels like even HN users would rather post their DNA and a list of illegal drugs that helped them pass an exam before they'd talk about their sex lives, for better or for worse.

As far as I thought, that’s why she does this, her technical skills and her appearance don’t align only if you have a preconceived notion about how she should look

Yeah, IIRC on Twitter she's pointed out that it's really common for rebellious teen girls to rebel by "dressing sexy", and for women in general to be interested in fashion, and she would really like those girls and women to feel welcome in technically innovative spaces; hopefully if I've gotten that wrong she'll chime in to correct me.

Also, though, it isn't really practical for her to get her breast implants removed just because woke "feminists" at Google and NPR are uncomfortable with the sexualization of women's bodies.