Nitpick: Small and medium, not just large public gatherings, and a larger variety of them, are also a big city draw. But one of the biggest big city draws is the large variety of employment -- not just for you, but your kids. You don't know what career they'll go into and they're more likely to be able to do it while staying near the metro area they grew up in if it's a large one with a good large varied job market, as opposed to having to choose between career and staying near family. Obviously remote/hybrid work makes that a little easier, but a lot of stuff still has to be done on site, it's still a competitive advantage to be able to choose between local AND remote jobs as opposed to ONLY remote jobs because your hometown is so small, and hybrid doesn't really make metro areas irrelevant, it merely expands their size, much as highways and commuter trains once did 50 and 100 or so years ago.

Local businesses and restaurants, especially having a lot of variety and choice for each, are big draws for big cities. I'd thought about moving to suburbia for a larger property but I'd really have nothing to do all day beyond peter around my larger house. I wouldn't be able to walk to all the things I walk to from my place now, from businesses and stores but also hiking and parks, and especially informal city stuff like the people selling tacos or fruit on the sidewalk. I would miss out on a lot of hobbies I engage in that wouldn't be well supported in an area with a smaller population. Tons of little services I rely on only really work at scale with a big city population, both from private companies and services offered by the city itself (like the free compost program I exploit heavily).

This is all stuff I've been doing or using constantly even with the pandemic. Some stuff like taking advantage of public amenities like hiking trails have become an even stronger habit of mine, thanks to the pandemic. I'm one to opt to walk to the local store, feel a product in my hands and decide to buy it, vs ordering from Amazon, something you can only do if you live somewhere dense enough to sustain these local stores. Even getting an uber to come out to a Columbus suburb is going to be a process; they are probably going to just deny your ride if you aren't doing an easy couple mile bar hop around OSU or the Short North/downtown area or going to the airport.

sounds like you're living in a bubble. people in NYC are out and about socializing. not living like a hermit. there's like 50 dance events every weekend.

Even in the most closed-down part of the pandemic, getting some takeout was a nice way to make yet another evening stuck at home into at least somewhat of an 'event,' silly as that seems.

This may be true for you but come to any major city and there are large events every single night. It's back to pre-covid. Every bar in NYC is packed, concerts are back. I went to see 4 shows last weekend.