Life is indeed harder for some exactly for the reason that societal norms are being imposed on them. Think corporations and the norms they impose on all the industries. I personally work hard to mask my differences but it does take a lot more effort on my part. All these efforts could have been used to be more productive and efficient.

Why should people need an excuse not to live up ‘standard’ societal norms?

In any case someone can be wrong about having autism, but not wrong that they have a particular challenge that others do not.