All conferences I've been to are good about offering suggestions for near-by childcare or even on-site child care for all parents. If that wasn't offered, that's more evidence the conference wasn't run well. It's not appropriate to have a 1 year old babbling over a speaker giving a presentation and the organizers should have quietly spoke to the person caring for the child and removed them from the situation.
I don't think that has anything to do with CoCs.
As to your first comment, I would urge you to extend some compassion to individuals who do not or cannot stand up for themselves. An individual who has been the victim of trauma or abuse is not inherently 'mentally weak' and did not necessarily 'skip a part of growing up'.
Consider for example:
In the late 90s and early 2000s it was a common part of the gamer vernacular to use the term 'rape' in a way that was synonymous with 'pwning', '0wning', or otherwise overwhelmingly beating someone in a game. This terminology was incredibly insensitive (and psychologically damaging) to gamers who were victims of sexual assault, and many venues and gaming communities had to introduce rules to forbid its usage (alongside other epithets and hurtful language).
These rules were not intended to give victims of abuse a 'false sense of security' they were intended to raise awareness within these communities for what was considered acceptable behavior, and to educate individuals who (despite acting without malice) did not consider the potential harm they might be causing others.
Likewise, someone who is part of a marginalized group, or someone who a Code of Conduct is intending to protect, should not need to independently apply social pressure to every individual who cannot conduct themselves with civility. That is an unfair burden of expectation to place on the shoulders of few, when the responsibility belongs to us all.
While I would love to live in a world where people can behave with empathy and compassion for others, the undeniable reality is that bad faith actors will always need some explicit rules. Otherwise, they will merely hide behind the façade of "No one said I couldn't do x, it's not against the rules!'.
And yes, I believe it is 'ok if the mentally weak feel welcome', I do not believe you should need to be an emotionally impervious hero to wish to attend a social or professional gathering.
That was not the question the op was asking, and you're misrepresenting his point by removing the second part.
Edit: The question was: assuming that there exist a risk that all this struggle for inclusivity will repel those people [from categories you are specifically trying to include] that already manage to fight and stand up for their rights, is the risk worth it? At least, that's how I read it.
And the answer can still be "yes", obviously, as long as we're clear about the question.
So it is apparently ok if the mentally weak feel welcome, and those which have learnt to defend themselves no longer showing up because they dont feel at home? Great, reminds me of one of the last interactions I had in a conference setting. Small children in the conference room. As a blind individual, I really rely on hearing what the speaker says. I cant just look at the slides. I already knew it wouldnt go well, but I tried to discuss the issue. At first, I heard some sympathy for my point of view. And 2 hours later, the same person didnt want to stand up for the issue anymore. So I guess womens right to bring their 1 year olds everywhere they want was trumping the needs of a disabled person attending the same conference. Thanks, I am done with this hypocrity.