Re:I wish I could write this well
by nzmsv on Friday June 18, 2021 @01:25AM
(#27547623)
Some feedback:
1) "Feedback" is uncountable
2) The long sentence starting with "To do that" should be split into two after "correct". As written, the clause that follows is completely standalone and there is no conjunction to connect it to the rest of the sentence.
3) This is more of a style thing, but I would expand the word "that" in "that's especially hard". For example, into "getting this feedback". Why? Because "that" should refer to some concept you already mentioned, but there is nothing in the preceding sentence it can meaningfully point to. What's hard? Needing feedback? No, getting the feedback is hard, but that phrase doesn't appear anywhere, so you have a dangling pointer :)
1) "Feedback" is uncountable
2) The long sentence starting with "To do that" should be split into two after "correct". As written, the clause that follows is completely standalone and there is no conjunction to connect it to the rest of the sentence.
3) This is more of a style thing, but I would expand the word "that" in "that's especially hard". For example, into "getting this feedback". Why? Because "that" should refer to some concept you already mentioned, but there is nothing in the preceding sentence it can meaningfully point to. What's hard? Needing feedback? No, getting the feedback is hard, but that phrase doesn't appear anywhere, so you have a dangling pointer :)