You're probably a "No problem!" guy. I actually look for people like you in my own organization because you're trouble, but I'll write this from your perspective.

With your employment history, you'll be very eager to please. You will say "Yes" and "No problem" to anything, which is not a problem, if it's actually not a problem. But this:

> when there's a conflict between expectations and requirements from management, and lack of agency to actually be as productive as I can be.

tells me it is a problem. Your quote is always true in any company. This will always happen. You will always burn out.

Here is what you do. You don't answer "No problem". You answer "Write down exactly what you want and a timeframe when you need it and I'll see if I can deliver". This will do two things:

-50% of your work will disappear. There are many middle managers who just go around delegating, thinking that is their job. In reality this is procrastination and they are useless. They will not even be able to write a spec sheet (look into how a good one looks and demand exactly that). These are the most idiotic projects in the company and now you will not be involved

-the projects that come with a spec sheet have self documenting ~code~ expectations. If you force people to write something down in a specific manner, most will realise their lunacy

Then you communicate. Don't hide anything. Tell everyone involved exactly the ups and downs (this is where lack of agency comes in and where it disappears with competent management. If it's incompetent you'll at least not feel responsible or shame) of the project. This isn't poker.

There. This might be too personal. This might be completely wrong. But please realise that it's you doing this to yourself.

Actually no, this could almost not be further from accurate. I say almost because there was one case where I definitely committed to way too much at once, but I can't think of a way it's generally true. Based on your answer and re-reading my comment, it seems like I could have phrased one bit differently. I meant expectations in terms of software delivery, but requirements more broadly. As in, being expected to complete X, but also being required to do it a noisy office or handle customer support troubleshooting. I think what you're saying is important though, I just happened to read similar advice when I identified that I was doing that to myself years ago. It was no doubt a problem I found myself in, and probably did contribute to burnout the first time, but the bigger issue then was that I was already just staring at my screen hopelessly wondering why I couldn't motivate myself to write html. Happened about 6 months in and that's my going residency so far. Its usually a few months previous to that where a manager makes a huge and arbitrary change even though I've figured out how to be productive by then. Like shuffling all the teams in one case, and putting me (adhd) on customer support.

Apologies, if I had pegged you all wrong.

> manager makes a huge and arbitrary change

This is a violation of agreed upon terms, though. Same as feature creep. Again, most managers are just looking for work theatre, rightfully afraid they'll be found out for the imposters they are.

This behavior is extremely demotivating. "why I couldn't motivate myself to write html." - maybe you are right and you can't write html under these circumstances?

Leave out the adhd, maybe customer support is just something you absolutely do not want to do, so where is the motivation supposed to come from?

Thank you, this post gave me something to chew on.