School is different because the participants, by definition are not yet mature adults. The solution in that case is education.

In the workplace, respect for others is an expected part of the role of each person. If a person asks to be identified by a particular name, or by the use of particular pronouns, then no other person in that workplace has the right to argue that they can't/won't because of their personal beliefs.

You're absolutely right. Just because disrespect to other children tends to be tolerated in schools, it doesn't mean it should be.