The ratio of amount and significance of action it takes over my trust in it is too high.

You don't need to use any of the driver assistance features. It’s not doing any of that if you don’t explicitly engage it and sometimes even requires enabling settings toggles.

Here's the deal though, when I press the brake pedal in my truck the force is mechanically applied via a hydraulic system to brake pads in the wheels.

I've read that Tesla abstracted all that with electric signals coming from a computer, now a proprietary software system sits between my legs input and the brake pads.

What if it goes wrong? You can try to convince me that it is an RTOS where signals from the brake pedal have the highest priority. And it seems to be that way, but I'd rather not.

I've dealt with enough computer problem to trust some onboard computer that can receive updates from the internet over how I brake.

Not sure where you’re getting your FUD. The steering and breaks on a Tesla are mechanically connected with electric assist motors just like all modern cars, including your truck.

Per mile driven Teslas are the safest vehicle on the road. The software helps ensure the safe operation of the vehicle. It’s really not that scary. The software is overlaid on a pretty standard vehicle aside from tue fact that it uses electric motors instead of an internal combustion engine.

Have you ever been on a plane?

One thing that comes to mind is that the wiper functionality has to be accessed from the center console touchscreen, and generally when you need it on you need it right then.

Not on the Model 3,Y, it doesn't. You press the button on the left widget behind the steering wheel (the lever/knob you use for your turn signal).