You don't have to make it for me haha. This is not a product specification and I am not a demanding customer. It's a hypothetical command that popped into my head while browsing a site with hacker in the name.

It's also a command I could throw together in about an hour with a bit of bash if I really wanted it. Mix in a bit of curl, bit of whatever the sendmail command is these days, bit of Twilio. Job's a good'un.

For the record "sprinkle some AI on it" is if statements, it was a yoke.