When I was in middle school, one day I noticed that this one girl was the most amazing person on the planet and I couldn't stop thinking about her.

I imagine being gay would be a lot like that, except it would've been a boy.

I would suggest asking yourself "what is being straight?", assuming that you identify as such.

It's more like not having a deficiency in perceiving the full spectrum of colours; or having a difference in spectrum deficiency.

If you can't see red, then I'm going to have a tough time explaining red to you.

I can certainly interpolate my personal experiences but I'm afraid I would miss something. Also, doing so would not explain this:

Why some people dress or act similar to opposite sex to appear attractive to someone of the same sex? I mean, voice gestures etc. Hm...I should not said act, it's likely their trait. Anyway, why would someone who is gay be attracted to that person rather than opposite sex. I think sexuality is quite more fluid and calling someone gay does not mean much beyond 'not straight'.

If this question is strictly about the study in OP and not a broader philosophical question, then it's worth pointing out that the study doesn't actually use the word gay but instead:

> In this study, we use the term “same-sex sexual behavior,” which is defined as having ever had sex with someone of the same sex.

https://science.sciencemag.org/content/365/6456/eaat7693

An innate desire to form an atypical pairing in a non-reproductive fashion.

Honestly i have no idea but this might be one of the last places left on the internet you can ask a question like this without getting dogpiled.

I've batted for both teams in my life and i still can't tell you.

Indeed, sexual attraction is a lot more complicated than "I am attracted to this bimodal extreme of gender."

Agreed, and it isn't a static thing defined at birth by nature, it can change backwards and forwards over a lifetime.

Not sure why i'm getting a hard time from our co-commenters. I assumed this place being primarily US and Tech it would be quite liberal.

Heh, the political spectrum of this place is broad and well-distributed, but the quality of discussion _tends_ to be more respectful than most forums.

I'm quite (socially) liberal and I thought your post was simply wrong, for starters. Among the places you can ask the question "what is being gay" without getting "dogpiled" are countless gay sites. Aren't gay sites part of the internet?

How can a question be wrong?

The statement I take issue with is "[...] this might be one of the last places left on the internet you can ask a question like this without getting dogpiled."

There are lots of places on the internet where asking honest questions about the gay experience is not scary and will not get you flamed. Indeed, the existence of such venues is crucial to the self-discovery of gay people — especially gay people who live in hostile environments, and who may be in great need of a kind confidant.

"What does it mean to be gay?" is a question that gay people ask themselves, especially while forming their identities. So there are many, many places where you can find kind and thoughtful answers to it.

Usually refers to romantic and/or sexual attraction to the same sex.

> Is it dislike, fear(?) of opposite sex?

Not generally, no, just like most straight people don't dislike members of their own sex.

I think a lot of straight people would, however, feel a degree of repulsion towards the idea of kissing and having sex with someone of the their non preferred-sex. A consideration which, due to culturally norms, is probably pushed into the heads of gay people.

Anecdotally I think most of my gay friends have commented on how gross vaginas are to them. Add whatever clarifications on fluidity and spectrums that you want....

Both. It is not fear-based. It's the full package when it comes to sexuality and romance.

I assume it’s a physical attraction to members of the same sex, with the emotional dimension developing in the same way as it does between any two individuals in a mated pair.

In the simplest terms, it’s seeing a beautiful naked body of the opposite sex and getting zero sexual pleasure out of it. That’s it. Being gay doesn’t stop you from forming close bonds with the opposite sex just like being straight doesn’t stop you from having best friends of the same sex.