Ask HN: Best books on “friendship” and how to make/maintain friends?

Re:Ask HN: Best books on “friendship” and how to make/mainta... by chrisbennet on Wednesday January 20, 2021 @10:27AM (#25847496)

Not a book recommendation, sorry, but I do have some advice:

You make friends by being friendly - doing nice for others, even strangers, without expecting reciprocation. Some of these people will become friends.

You keep friends by contacting them at least once a year. I have a lot of my friend's birthdays in my phone calendar. I text them on their birthday and sometimes on Christmas. It's the little things like calling them when they're in the hospital. The current plague is depressing, text your friends a tell them you're thinking of them and bring their spirits up.

I have a vendor that I buy my hardware from. I bring them cookies now and then. (I make cookies and will eat the whole batch if I don't give some away. I thank them for "taking a cholesterol bullet for me".) I expected nothing from them but they are friends now.

If this sounds like a lot of work, be prepare to not have as many friends. And that's OK too.

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Re:Ask HN: Best books on “friendship” and how to make/mainta... by simonebrunozzi on Wednesday January 20, 2021 @10:46AM (#25847761)

Thanks, this is really good advice - thankfully, it's not entirely novel to me :)

I don't mind that it's not a book recommendation, either. As long as it's useful in understanding how to make and maintain friends. Thanks for sharing it.

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