If you actually attempt to assess fundamental value of Bitcoin based on anything comparable it’s value approaches zero. It’s pretty much worthless at anything it’s ever been positioned to achieve except crime and speculation.
Frankly it’s not even good at crime.
A bitcoin address gives you a unique global address decentralizated that funds can be sent to. There is utility to that function.
Using your description the internet is a magic place faeries built that provides no usefulness because it's virtual.
The internet provides utility. Bitcoin provides speculation and crime.
Bitcoin is the best performing asset of the past years compared to stocks, gold, commodities, etc.
>Bitcoin provides speculation and crime.
Everything valuable can become a tool, or a reason for criminal activity.
The rarity of owning some paper with ink on it!