In 99% of the US by area, $170k would be a very good salary for a software engineer too.

Silicon Valley is a statistical outlier compared to the US as a whole for salaries and for cost-of-living.

Most of the software engineers in the US don’t work in a place with $170k salaries and $1m+ homes. For most of the US, salaries are 1/2 of that and homes are 1/4 of that.

That's a large reason of why I've stayed in the Phoenix area, though I think about leaving every single summer. The engineering pay is about 2/3 of SF area, give or take, but cost of houses are around 1/4 or so. It's rough thinking of a lateral move in salary, or not enough of a boost to overcome cost of living differences.

Of course housing costs have gone up significantly relative to pay in the past decade, so who knows.

I remember slightly earlier on in my career as an intermediate level engineer earning $70k living in an area (not in US) where the median house price is $1m+

An extra $100k would have been really nice.