Well put. The one time i expressed interest but reluctance at leaving my previous job, I was invited on a coffee and chat with a couple lead engineers to help decide. We got along well, talked about technical things, swapped stories about problems solved. Afterwards, i got the impression going through the technical interview would be more of a formality.

I think part of the problem is not everyone is good at giving interviews. But most software engineers can talk about their work once you get them going.

FWIW, I think white boarding interviews are pretty fun.