Maybe this is a stupid question, but why is any hint of discretion needed at all?
What is the problem with an uncovered breast and baby eating?
Is it for example that you feel excited from seeing a breast, and don't like that happening in a restaurant?
Or maybe it feels weird with people slightly undressed, in the same way as you might think it was weird if, say, a man (not woman) didn't wear a t-shirt at all?
Or is it that you think it's somehow a tiny bit dirty with babies and them eating, maybe drooling or sth like that?
Or sth else?
Do you really need to ask though?
When there's a topless woman in the middle of a restaurant, 99% of people are going to feel something is off.
There's a not-so-subtle difference between 'breastfeeding' and 'I'm going to leave my boobs hanging out while I set my baby down and get something out of my bag'
If you were in a restaurant, and someone was dangling their breasts for everyone to see (even a man for that matter) it would seem really odd.
I've seen women breastfeeding in public (airplanes, cafes) countless times, and I don't think anyone ever batted an eye, but there was always a shade of discretion.
A woman dangling her breasts around in restaurant, on the other hand, is a different thing entirely.
It's kind of ridiculous that we have a social protocol wherein nudity would not be appropriate in a given context, but then because of some specific need, that this protocol goes away. No. Nobody minds at all that someone is breastfeeding but people do mind fairly obvious nudity.
And I really don't think there's a soul in California who cares that a woman is breastfeeding or pumping milk in their car.
I don't personally condone eating nude in public in a restaurant, but there is a broad spectrum of ambivalence towards nudity. For instance, plenty of europe is fine with mixed sex nude saunas and beaches. And the whole thing is pretty asexual.
If you feel ashamed or self conscious or indecent topless on the beach, or even in a same sex changing room, it's probably not a stretch to think you may feel shame breastfeeding on the side of the road in a car.
Now you will have prudes and exhibitionists in any society but the window of normality is going to be a function of what the environment dictates. And iirc being topless on a beach in the US is illegal, whereas no one will blink in Spain or France at a topless woman (except the American/Brit on holiday)
But this is learned behaviour - most children don't care about being dressed or not
When thinking about it, personally, although I'm a man, I'd feel a bit socially anxious / worried about what others would think, if I was without a t-shirt in a restaurant.
> learned behaviour - most children don't care about being dressed or not
(Actually I cared "a lot" and was disappointed when I had to start wearing bath shorts)
Remember that this was a perception of stigmatisation, not necessarily an actual stigmatised response.
Personally, I don't think people would bat an eye at a mother pumping milk in their car. Among all of my various acquaintances of every stripe, I can't imagine any of the caring, and I've never once in my life ever heard anyone say anything about it.
Once, a mother was 'open breastfeeding' in the middle of a busy restaurant, I didn't say anything or think much about it, but I thought it was odd she was flouting her bare breast smack in the middle of a busy restaurant, I thought a hint of discretion, like a blanket, or being at the corner table facing a wall would be appropriate. I mean, we are 'eating'. I feel as though this woman was perhaps trying to 'make a point'. Not that I really care.
But I just can't see how anyone would be upset or even noticing someone pumping breastmilk in their car or wherever as long as there's a shade of discretion. Even if someone might 'bat an eye' they still probably don't care.
I don't doubt the authors personal feelings one bit, but that someone feels there is a stigma does not necessarily mean there is.