I found once I dropped certain stoic, masculine behaviours I felt expected from society I became more productive and a better person. There are a lot of people who show subtle hostility to me now (both men and women) but it's honestly not worth worrying what other people think. I'm way too relieved most days.

What are the behaviors?

Lot of folks get upset when men mention getting upset at something. Ex. "That hurt my feelings." "I don't like that you said that." "That made me happy." "Wow I feel great." Etc.

Men are commonly expected to be stoic and not express such things and just "go about their day". If they don't, it's viewed as dramatic and over-expressive. It's interpreted as immaturity, imo.

Off the top of my head, the things I do more now are: - putting more effort into my appearance in nontraditional ways (eg: makeup, androgynous clothing, haircuts, etc.) - mentioning that I'm frustrated by something - acting naturally when people might be goading me into confrontational behaviour

"...stoic, masculine behaviors I felt expected from society..."

I don't know what society you live in, but being stoic and masculine seems quite rare these days and is often frowned upon...

GP probably meant the pressure not to show weakness or emotion, which I'd say is still more commonly internalized by men.

Jealous! I don't find that the case in Western Canada, personally.

Pursue art if anything. It will reset your psychological clock back a few decades and you will be able to do an activity with younger people without coming across as weird.

If anything, a well rounded worldview brought upon by age is conducive to making art that has a grander, more truthful (not necessarily more factual) statement.

I wouldn't worry too much about trying to make grander more truthful statements with art.

Making things for the sake of making things will do. It doesn't even matter if you don't get better at it over time.

Make things (art, food, woodworking, gardens, anything) for the pure joy of creation and playfulness. That seems like a more surefire way to stay young than trying to make statements.

> I would run down the street as a kid. If I did that today, it would look weird.

I still do this during early morning runs (when I have them). It definitely feels weird, but also a lot of fun. Most of the weird feeling indeed comes from "but what if they see me?"

I wish it would be normal and accepted for adults to play too. You can still be a responsible and grown-up person.

On the bright side, because it's not normal, it makes it easier to spot people who might be worth hanging out with.

(like Dolphus Raymond with his paper bag, engaging with kids may provide useful cover for playful adults)

"When Kelvin looked through the eyepiece he saw what was undoubtedly the phenomenon that Maxwell had described, but in addition there was the image of a little man dancing about ... Maxwell had achieved this by the addition of a zoetrope ... Kelvin could not help asking: 'What is the little man there for?' ... 'Just for fun, Thomson.'"

https://www.cambridge.org/core/books/fourier-analysis/ode-to...

“Man child” is the label you’ll hear thrown around for that.

This is a nice part about having kids. You get to play with them and be reminded about how fun it is (tag and climbing the jungle gym is still fun and so are legos!).

I've found that it was in my youth that I most cared what other people thought.

The older I get, the less I care about it.