The closest to an enlightened, benevolent dictator in modern times I think is Lee Kuan Yew.

Somehow China has been an outlier to this norm, so far.

I disagree, China seems to fit right into the pattern.

Mao became undisputed leader. His purges were bad enough that the party decided to implement a 10 year term limit.

Xi removed that limit, and now China is swinging slowly towards authoritarianism. We're still in the early years of his rule at this point. Wait till he makes a mistake and his grip starts slipping, then he will see enemies everywhere.

When someone makes themselves ruler for life, it tells you that their character is not suitable for that position, because they lack the humility to hand over their work to a successor. Because they've decided they can't trust other people's motives and competence.

Enlightened in the sense I think it’s meant here, but not benevolent.

It significantly depends on who you are. Uyghurs and Falung Gong practicioners would probably disagree.