Control is one element of self hosting, albeit full control may be difficult to obtain and also maintain speed and privacy. Pushing your ingress out to an edge node affords interesting properties. One of which is privacy (keeps your home ISP IP hidden from the public.) A service like Cloudflare gets you the same for browser traffic, a service like hoppy can work for all ports, email, ssh, voip, etc. Control can and perhaps should be implemented not at the channel layer but through cryptographic means such as authentication and end to end encryption.