What's wrong with 4k monitors? I'm typing this on Fedora machine with one (default install with no tinkering, Gnome on Wayland).
Mixed DPI is not coming to X11 displays. If you insist on X11, you are going to have bad time.
macOS can scale different parts of an application differently depending on which screen it is on. So if you are in the process of moving an application from one screen to another, it doesn't change size mid-move.
Windows can't do that, and I've even seen applications where all windows belonging to an application use the same DPI (chosen based on which window is in focus), regardless of the DPI of the screen the window itself is on.
So it seems to me the integration of mixed-DPI into window rendering APIs was not well handled by the development team behind its implementation in Windows.
The most common "solution" I see is lowering the resolution of the high-DPI display, but that's not a solution, that's actually not even a workaround, it is literally removing the problem by pretending my screen is not as good as it is.
Compare the experience with Windows for example, where disconnecting from your external monitors pushes all applications and windows to the remaining monitors, and doesn't restore them when the external monitor is reconnected.
macOS also handles mixed-DPI really well, no other vendor even comes close, Windows simply scales according to the monitor most of the application window is on, resulting in ugly resizing of applications when moving from one monitor to another.
I don't know what you're talking about with regards to "turning on HiDPI", can you elaborate?
Huh? I have a dock that I disconnect and reconnect from all the time; windows move onto my laptop screen when I disconnect, and move back onto my docked screen when I reconnect.