I’m going to go against the grain here and say I absolutely dread going to Costco but tolerate it because of the prices and bulk availability of certain produce.

A quick ranty list of complaints:

The store is too small for the amount of people and the enormous carts. It is a game of bumper cars every time.

Similarly, more than once I had to give up since the parking lot was completely full and I could only take so circling the lot. The gas lines are reminiscent of the pictures from the ‘73 oil embargo.

The location of items and item selection changes constantly.

There is few staff available to help you find anything.

The free samples attract hangers on like moths to a flame, blocking traffic. People treat the samples as a free lunch for their kids, and let kids ride unsafely ride inside the cart and not in the cart seats — no one stops this.

I have more, but writing this is already getting to me.

I'm curious why it bothers you where in the cart the parents allow their kids to sit? I can see how all of the other things you list affect you, but not that one.

I believe that most of your complaints about the experience could be mitigated by timing. My local Costco"Opens" at 9am but the doors are usually open by 8:30. My trick is to make a very fast run on a weekday morning before work (luckily there's one on the way) - have a list, grab what I need, pay and go - and I've found this works wonders for maximizing my time.

Sounds like the Costco in Sunnyvale, I absolutely loathed going there. I'm not sure what the other Costcos in Silicon Valley look like, but Sunnyvale is a terrible experience.

Every where else I have been, Costco is great. The store is never packed, even if busy at times. Checkout lines never exceed 5-10 minutes. Gas lines rarely exceed 10 minutes at the busiest of times.

Go to Sam's Club. No lines. Empty parking lot. Just don't think about why that is.

Its far but the business center in South SF is wonderful in the mornings. They open at 7 and its basically a ghost town.

Yeah, no one goes to Costco anymore; it's too crowded.

All of this just sounds like you're going at peak times. My parents tend to go on weekdays in the last half an hour before closing - Thursday is good to have fresh stuff for the weekend. I tend to go Saturday morning at opening - sample stations aren't set up, food court isn't a mess, everything is fast.

Yeah I am in the same boat, I dread going to Costco on weekends or before any major holiday. And yes I hate free samples, people horde around free sample stations blocking traffic.

I prefer to go during lunch hour or after work.

When I walk in I usually say something like, “You get started, I’m gonna grab a ‘before’ dog then catch up...”

I’ll admit to having gone in for just a hot dog before.

My wife and I, along with our toddler, absolutely LOVE going on "Costco dates" (ahhh the romance). Two slices of pizza, a hot dog and a drink, and if we're feeling spicy, one of their acai bowls, all for 11 dollars.

Doesn't get better than that.

The absolute key is to eat BEFORE you shop, because otherwise you end up with at least 30% more food that you probably wouldn't get if you weren't hungry.

We have two toddlers (1.5 and 3) and we LOVE Costco. Besides the food (which everybody loves) they have huge isles. Big carts. Lots of stuff for the kids to look at. If we’re overwhelmed we seriously just toss our kids into the back of the van and roll in there. They love being there and it’s a simple way to spend an evening together.

In Poland, when I lived closer to IKEA, I used to go there just for the hot dogs. The IKEA hot dogs are the pinnacle of perfection: a bun, a sausage, ketchup and mustard. Tasty, cheap, and without all the bullshit ingredients everyone else adds just to justify jacking up the price or to pretend to offer a healthy snack.

I like the chicken bake.

Nothing wrong with that - $1.50 for a hot dog with a la carte garnishes and a large drink? The value is nearly unbeatable.

I got my mba at Costco!

I like to think that we all do. Bless up