You're not wrong, really. But what Microsoft has always done differently is control the distribution and installation of their own updates. With Android it's always been up to a combination of Google releasing the update, the manufacturer putting their touches on it and then the service provider releasing it. Of course a savvy user could get the update as soon as it is available in some cases (in other cases it'll break your phone).

I'm not advocating for really any particular way of doing it, but rather just noting how Apple definitely has the opportunity for making OS updates a smoother experience than either Microsoft or Google because of their level of control at the hardware level. Apple doesn't always get it right (see Catalina), but they could do better than they do.